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Neurodiversity pathway: Quick read guides

How to you know your child needs support with sibling relationships? 

It can be difficult for children with Autistic siblings to come to terms with their sibling’s diagnosis. Here are some of the following difficulties you may notice in them: 

  • Finding it difficult to understand or respond to their sibling Feeling that they are not being treated fairly within the family 
  • Experiencing physical and verbal bulling because they have an Autistic sibling 
  • Worried about future care of their Autistic sibling  

What kinds of support can help? 

There are many Autistic people in the UK, and many families who have been looking for ways to support their children. Some of the things that have worked for them are written below. Every family is different, so they might not work in your situation. You may have to try several before you find ones that work for you. 

  • Try to spend time together as a family. Also make space for one-on-one time with each child. This will help everyone feel valued and connected. 
  • Explore things that all siblings can enjoy doing together e.g. music, art and do them together as a family. This will help create bonding among siblings and strengthen their connection. 
  • Create time to talk with the siblings, listen to them and find out how they feel about having an Autistic sibling. It will help the siblings feel heard and understood 
  • Support siblings in developing short, simple and respectful ways to talk to their friends about Autism. It will help them promote comfort and pride in their sibling’s neurodiversity. 
  • Teach them positive ways to use to navigate different challenges in relating with their Autistic sibling. It will help them feel empowered and build strong sibling relationships. 
  • Ensure that siblings have some time  away from the family.  

 

What about my Autistic child’s needs? 

You may find that a mix of strategies may help best in supporting your child. Also, as your child grows and develops, there are often changes in need, meaning that you need to revisit and review existing strategies to determine which helps best. As you try different strategies, you build a clearer understanding of your child’s unique strengths, needs and the best support for them. 

Learning about Autism can also help you understand your child’s unique strengths and needs better. Connecting with other parents with Autistic children can also be a great support by sharing information, ideas and emotional support. 

 Understanding your Autistic child and learning more about siblings 

As you continue to learn more about your Autistic child’s strengths and  needs, you also should find out how to support their siblings. The following resources might help: 

 

  • Everybody is Different: A book for young people who have Autistic brothers or sister Paperback – 15 Feb 2002 

Why Can Autistic Children find social situations difficult? 

  • They may interpret social norms in their own unique way and may fail to understand the necessity of sticking with them 
  • They might not often understand other people’s social cue, such as body language or tone of voice 
  • They often have a rigid idea about how things they should happen, which can sometimes differ from what others expect 
  • Points of transition e.g., Moving house, parental separation, starting school. 

 

What is a Social Story? 

Social Stories are short, supportive narratives that describe a particular situation, event, or activity in a clear and respectful way. They are designed to help Autistic children navigate certain situations in ways that feel comfortable and empowering to them. 

There are many social stories available online for different situations which can be downloaded. However, it works better when a situation is written specifically with an Autistic child in mind. You might want to write your own social situation for your child based on their strengths and need. 

How can I write a Social Situation? 

  • Observe and notice a situation that is difficult for your child, e.g working in a group, coping with a change in teacher, understanding when to be quiet, etc. 
  • Look at the situation focusing on your child’s angle. This will help ensure the story is personalised and supportive 
  • Use a mix of sentence types to build a clear and encouraging narrative: 
  • Descriptive: Share simple, factual details about what happens in the situation. This is to descript or explain the people involved, setting, actions, events or routines in a reassuring way 
  • Perspective: Explain why things might happen or how others may feel or reach in the situation. This is to build social empathy and social understanding for your child 
  • Directive: Provide guidance and suggestion of what your child could do in the situation. This is to give the child possible ways to respond in a situation and support their confidence 

Ensure that you have at least 3 descriptive or perspective sentences for every directive sentence. It will the child to understand why they should do something. It should not be a list of rules. 

For example: 

  • Social situation – Knowing when to stop joking 
  • My name is Joseph. I have a great sense of humour and I like to make people laugh. 
  • Other people like to laugh at my jokes, but sometimes they are not in the mood for a joke. 
  • They might be busy doing their work or talking to someone else. 
  • When people say: “it’s not funny anymore” that means I have to stop. 
  •  I can do something else that I find fun. Like playing PS4 or watching YouTube. 
  • Then everyone is happy. 

 

How do you use a Social Story? 

  • Read it with the child frequently 
  • Encourage and ensure the child read it whenever they need to 
  • Add pictures and colour to make it more concrete 

More information : 

https://carolgraysocialstories.com/social-stories/what-is-it/ 

https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/about-autism/autism-and-communication 

 

 

Behaviour is a form of communication. It is key to support your child or young person with the cause of the behaviour; behaviour diaries can help to identify patterns and causes (Keeping a behaviour diary – Support for Parents from Action For Children) of behaviour.  

Autistic children and young people can demonstrate behaviours of distress such as:  

  • Meltdowns or overwhelm 
  • Actions that indicate distress, and that needs are misunderstood or not met  
  • Sensory seeking behaviour e.g. stimming (repetitive movements or sounds)  
  • Self-injurious behaviour e.g. hand or arm biting, skin picking and scratching 
  • Frustration and anger as well as behaviours that can appear as aggressive towards others  
  • Routine and rituals 
  • Anxiety in the face of demands 
  • Masking  
  • Smearing  
  • Experience ‘shutdown’ or situational mutism  

  

These behaviours may be due to the following reasons: 

  • Anxiety  
  • Sensory differences e.g. can get distracted by sensory stimuli or being over (hyper) or under (hypo) sensitive to things such as lights and noise  
  • Communication differences  
  • Conscious or unconscious attempt to appear to fit in with others, this could be known as masking or camouflaging 
  • Misinterpretation of others  
  • Difficulties identifying and expressing emotions  
  • Response to disrupted plans or expectations  
  • Difficulties with understanding social rules and cues  

This is not an exhaustive list, it is really important to understand and develop with your child in mind and how you can support them.  

  

For more information: 

The brain processes a huge amount of sensory information received from both the body and the environment.  This sensory information is first received as sensory input through our senses, which include:  

External senses  Internal senses 
  • Vision 
  • Hearing 
  • Smell 
  • Taste 
  • Touch 
  • Proprioception – a sense of the position and movement of the body 
  • Interoception – information from our internal organs, e.g., thirst or hunger.  
  • Vestibular – the sense of where our body is in relation to its surroundings.  

 

 

Autistic children and autistic young people often experience the world with unique sensory strengths and differences.  They might be more or less sensitive to the different types of sensory inputs.  You may notice your child:  

  • Viewing objects from unique perspectives 
  • Noticing sights and sounds that others may miss 
  • Becoming anxious or unsettled in noisy or busy places 
  • Preferring a limited range of foods due to texture, taste or smell 
  • Exploring objects by smelling and/or mouthing them 
  • Seeking lot of movement through activities such as running, jumping, rocking or spinning. 
  • Chewing on clothing, objects, or fingers 
  • Often fiddling or tapping 
  • Finding toothbrushing, haircuts, or nail trimming uncomfortable 
  • Enjoying deep pressure such as hugs, squeezes, or massage 
  • Finding certain fabrics, seams or labels uncomfortable 
  • Frequently bumping into objects  

 

To effectively support an autistic child or autistic young person, the most important thing is to listen, observe, learn, and adapt with empathy and curiosity.  Here are some ways you can support an autistic child or autistic young person’s sensory differences: 

  • Learn about the child or young person’s unique sensory needs and make reasonable adjustments that honour these needs.   
  • Create sensory supportive spaces at home, school, and in the community.  (E.g., consider how lighting and sound may impact comfort and focus) 
  • Acknowledge and support sensory-seeking behaviours, as they can be an important way for the child or young person to self-regulate 
  • Offer safe, accessible ways of meeting sensory needs.  For instance, to avoid them chewing on unsafe options such as pencils, provide easy-to-access alternatives like chewable jewellery, silicone pencil toppers or crunchy snacks 
  • Engage sensory tools proactively to reduce discomfort in overwhelming environments. For example, sunglasses can help with bright light, or noise-cancelling headphones can reduce sound sensitivity. 
  • Maintain a calm and predictable routine, and use tools like pictures or visual schedules to prepare them for new or potentially stressful transitions or environments 

 

Learn more about sensory differences and how to support autistic children and autistic young people in the pages below: 

Sensory Differences Workshop (Sensory Differences Workshop – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Strategies for sensory based eating difficulties (Strategies for sensory based eating difficulties – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Occupational therapy advice: Toileting (Sensory Differences) (Occupational therapy advice: Toileting (Sensory Differences) – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Dressing advice for sensory differences (Dressing advice for sensory differences – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Paying attention and sensory differences (Paying attention and sensory differences – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Autism and sensory processing (Autism and sensory processing – Children and Family Health Devon) 

Getting around for children with sensory differences (Getting around for children with sensory difficulties – Children and Family Health Devon) 

 

Autistic children and young people often demonstrate differences in their language and communication style.  

You may see the following: 

  • Struggles remembering and understanding everything they hear  
  • Repetitive language including echolalia  
  • Differences in volume and rate of speech e.g. particularly slow speech, jerky speech  
  • Struggles to verbally answer multi-part questions or instructions  
  • Struggles to understand abstract or non-literal language e.g. jokes  
  • Difficulties in knowing how to use and understand others non-verbal communication e.g. tone of voice including monotone and inconsistent volume, gesture including rocking and pointing, and eye-contact including avoidance of eye-contact and intermittent eye-contact.  
  • Struggles to identify or describe their emotions and feelings  
  • Use compensatory strategies during miscommunication e.g. circumlocution (many words), gesture, pointing 
  • Challenges with social communication skills e.g. turn-taking conversation  

It is also important to note that echolalia and vocal stimming can also be an important means of self-regulation.  

  

Some ways that you could support these differences:  

  • Support self-advocacy  
  • Ensure you have their attention  
  • Speak clearly, slowly and break instructions into smaller actions  
  • Allow them time to process what has been said  
  • Use alternative communication methods such as visual aids, whiteboard or AAC software and gestures 
  • Adjust expectations 
  • Validate stimming  
  • Create safe spaces or environments to ensure they feel comfortable and supported 
  • Supporting their understanding of social communication e.g. through comic strip conversations   

  

For more information:  

  

  

 

Anxiety can present in different ways for autistic children and young people.  Some of the responses to anxiety you may notice include: 

  • Asking repeated questions or engaging in repetitive behaviours.  This may be a way to feel reassured or maintain predictability 
  • Differences or inconsistencies in sleep or eating patterns.  This can reflect how an autistic child or young person is feeling or processing their environment, including sensory experiences like sensitivity to sounds, textures or smells.  
  • Expressing strong fears or worries, sometimes about things that may not seem concerning to others. This could be in the form of specific phobia.  
  • Seeking a sense of control.  This might be to create a feeling of safety or stability in uncertain or overwhelming situations.  
  • Becoming quiet or preferring time alone.  This may be a way to self-regulate  
  • Expressing distress through loud sounds or physical movement such as shouting, stomping or pacing.  This can help the autistic individual release stress or communicate overwhelm 
  • Showing a strong preference for routines or sameness.   

 

To support the autistic child or young person in managing anxiety, consider: 

  • Identifying sources of distress or triggers 
  • Creating structure and predictability 
  • Employing visual aids like schedules, social stories or emotions cards to provide support  
  • Recognising their need for repetitive behaviours and allowing space for them to engage in these behaviours safely 
  • Offering time and space for self-regulation without pressure 
  • Providing access to sensory tools that offer comforts.  Some examples are noise-cancelling headphones, fidgets or weighted items. 
  • Preparing them in advance for transitions and changes in routine, using clear and supportive language